Plateau... but not on raised ground

I can't feel a thing anymore. Won't feel depressed, disappointed nor upset. Neither do I feel motivated nor happy. Haha... guess my emotions have sort of plateaued... not on raised ground, but below ground level. I've fallen into a trench and started digging my way through. Now that I'm more settled, it seems like i won't fall any deeper; I'm already right at the bottom.

Prehaps this is better than my depression previously; feeling nothing is better than feeling upset after all. I'm just like a dead piece of meat at this moment (and "dead meat" literally). I cannot imagine life like that for long, or in the future. Really need someone to bring me some hope and instill some drive in me now.

If i have to get out of this trench on my own, prehaps I need to find back my old independent self. Or for an easier and painless option, wait for the holidays.